I’m so tired of hearing about how everyone hates Valentine’s Day. You might reply, “That’s easy for you to say, you have Bubba.” Let me tell you a thing about Bubba and me. We refuse to assimilate to the expectations of modern society. In other words, we are disgusted by holidays that get all blown out of proportion because someone is trying to make a buck.
- Are you dreading Valentine’s Day because you don’t have anyone to share it with? Share it with a friend, an offspring, or go take your mom and/or dad out to dinner for crying out loud! If you really don’t have ANYone who wants to be with you for a couple of hours, you have more problems than worrying about getting a heart-shaped box of chocolates.
- Are you spending hours trying to come up with an original Valentine’s gift? Let me clue you in. If she/he is going to be disappointed because you didn’t come up with something that has never been thought of before, you should be spending those hours trying to find a way out.
- Are you hoping for a proposal? Isn’t that rather trite? How about Friday, September 13th. Now that’s a good day for a proposal!
- Are you lamenting over how to propose? Wowing someone with a ring is easy. It’s the next 50 years that get tricky. You’re setting the bar here. Make sure you set it low enough that you have room to raise it every 5 years or so. You’re going to need that wiggle room. I’d also like to know why we don’t hear about women proposing? Aren’t we supposed to be all equal and everything?
Before you go criticizing me for being a romantic party-pooper, let me tell you that I am very romantic. I think that covering me with a blanket after I’ve fallen asleep on the couch is a sign of true love. Talking to me about the philosophical significance of The Tree of Life is a turn on. Bringing home Sezchuan on Friday night is the fastest way to my heart, and possibly heartburn, but I digress. I love love. This is all I require, but I require it constantly. Not just every February 14th. On February 14th Bubba and I like to gorge ourselves on some of those mini pink and red cupcakes and joke about how we didn’t need reservations.
Have I depressed you yet? Good. Let’s pick up our spirits with a little game. Everyone gets a prize, so you can’t lose!
- How It Works: This is an instant-win game beginning immediately and ending at 11:59:59 PM PT February 15th, 2013 (The day after Valentine’s Day). One Grand Prize will also be available to be won during the promotion period. In addition there will be a First Prize(s) available to be won during this promotion period. The Grand Prize will be revealed online at WholeyJeans.wordpress.com by Sunday, February 17th, 2013 at 11:59:59 PM PT. See Rule #5 for Prize details available to be won during promotion period. No purchase is necessary, nor is it possible.
- Eligibility: The Game is open to all married, single, divorced, partnered, widowed registrants ages 2 or older as of the date of participation. Employees of WholeyJeans World Headquarters (Barney, Sabbath, and Bun), and promotion agencies (Bubba) are not eligible. All federal, state, local, and especially household laws apply.
- How To Register: Any time between now and the end of the promotion period (see Rule #1), submit your entry in the comment section of this post. Entry must include 1) Participant’s intended recipient (by description only — no name required), and 2) Detail of how you played/will play the game (See Rule #4). Then click “post comment” to successfully complete your registration.
- How to Play: Participant must choose a non-romantic recipient to acknowledge for Valentine’s Day, such as a favorite cashier, co-worker, administrative assistant, receptionist, neighbor, server, or anyone Participant sees regularly, but has never acknowledged for Valentine’s Day. Participant may acknowledge their recipient through email, verbally, anonymously, by card/gift/song, through postal delivery, or any other generosity. Recipient must know this benevolence is in celebration of Valentine’s Day, and understand why they are appreciated by Participant.
- Available Game Prizes: The Grand Prize and First Prize(s) will be revealed online at WholeyJeans.wordpress.com by the end of the day on Sunday, February 16, 2013. The winners of the Grand Prize and First Prize(s) will be at the discretion of WholeyJeans.
- Grand Prize: An Official Cupid’s Arrow through the heart, and top mention on the Prize Reveal Post on Sunday, February 17, 2013.
- First Prize(s): Authenticated Valentine Hugs (kisses if appropriate) and mentions on the Prize Reveal Post on Sunday, February 17, 2013.
- Honorable Mentions: May be awarded as necessary.
- Instant Prize Winners: Every Participant is an Instant Prize Winner! Instant Prize will be awarded upon completion of Game Rule #4 in the form of heartfelt joy, a smile to be worn across the face, and a positive attitude adjustment toward Valentine’s Day.
- All winners will be linked to their related blogs, if applicable. All winners will be notified by comment reply to their registration.
- Release of Liability: By accepting any Prize, Winners (and parent/legal guardian if Winner is a minor in his/her state of residence) agree to hold Employees of WholeyJeans World Headquarters (Barney, Sabbath, and Bun), and promotion agencies (Bubba) harmless against any and all claims of giddiness, kindness, or softening of the heart arising out of acceptance, redemption, and/or use of any Prize.
NOTICE: ANY ATTEMPT OF AN INDIVIDUAL TO DELIBERATELY UNDERMINE VALENTINE’S DAY OR THE OPERATION OF THIS GAME IS A VIOLATION OF GLOBAL LOVE AND PEACE, AND SHOULD SUCH AN ATTEPT BE MADE, SPONSOR RESERVES THE RIGHT TO POKE HOLES IN EACH OF SAID INDIVIDUAL’S CHOCOLATE HEART ASSORTMENT.
Now go find your unsuspecting target.