That feeling when the high-diver misses his mark, his body rotating juuuust a fraction of a degree too far, and his body contacts the surface of the water with an audible slap . . . you lean forward, willing him to surface . . . not daring to breathe . . . and he POPS out of the water with a wave, gifting you with a sigh of relief . . .
This is how I know you must feel upon seeing my post! I am here waving and telling you I have emerged from:
- Black Thursday (known to some as Thanksgiving), Black Friday, Cyber Monday
- The germ-laden shopping crowds
- The Apocalypse
- The near-loss of my to-do list
- Burning my left hand on the turkey roaster
- Multiple high-fructose corn syrup crashes
- Blunt trauma to the instep
- Over-consumption of animal secretions
*If that isn’t enough, we remodeled the basement family room. It wasn’t a huge renovation, but in involved paint, entertainment-center cables, and the blending of his and her decor.
I’d like to spend the next few posts elaborating on these points, gradually ascending the ladder to the bloggers 30-meter platform. For now . . . APPLAUD! . . . I have broken the surface of my watery peril. Waving, I smile, ready to dive in again.
*No animals were harmed in the making of this holiday.