Every now and then I have inspiring, thought-provoking dreams. I have dreamt solutions to problems. I have dreamt new schemes for life or work. And then sometimes I have dreams like I did last night. I dreamt I was looking for a movie. Not just any movie, but either a horror flick or an erotic film (it was a DREAM . . . remember?) I don’t watch that stuff in real life. Whatever . . . .
On the computer was a screen much like what I use at work. Instead of inventory scrolling down the monitor, it was movies. In each description line were the genre and gender and ages of the main characters. It looked like this, except I’m making up the names of the movies because I don’t remember any of the movies listed.
First House on the Right Horror male(17), female(15), male(19)
Susie Wants a Slo Poke Erotic female(21), male(25)
Time out: I’m chuckling to myself, because that’s a really funny title for an erotic film, right? Anyone remember these?
None of the films fit what I was looking for. I was looking for older main characters. Something to which I could relate. I was thinking how I was tired of seeing some stupid teens mess about in the woods after his friend’s head just got ripped off. And I love the new cable series — admit it, they border on soft porn these days — but I know that no one looks that perfect in real life, and sex does not die at age 35.
Is it because writers think that people who are 40/50/60-years old don’t think about getting it on? Maybe we would think about it more, if they portrayed it more often. Are we too old to fantasize about the guy next door? Is it because we cringed at the thought of our own parents having desires? Instead we are supposed to be gardening and having heart attacks. Often, if we are depicted in love-making it’s a humorous scene. All I’m asking for is equal time in a seriously dirty scene.
As for the horror scenes, wouldn’t it be scarier to see Grampa climbing up to check out the knocking in the attic than some 30-year old? He isn’t as strong, not as quick, and nobody wants to see Grampa get hauled off by bloody claws. That’s just spine-tingling, nightmare-ridden stuff! I feel Gramps is a forgotten character in the spooky flick genre.
If the older generation are represented in terrorizing scenes, they are often the cause of it. They don’t want you to guess who dunnit, so it’s kids or old people — who would suspect the innocent child or helpless elder? Where is the older victim? I want to see a demon beast roaming the halls of a senior center. How scary is that?

FUNNY!
Please write a horror script I would love something new. I love horror movies, but I’ve watched so many I can usually figure them out early on. Btw, great title for a porn flick!
I’m not sure I’m clever enough to come up with something new. Wouldn’t it be fun to try, though? After I came up with the erotic title, I got to thinking I bet I’m not the first to come up with that. I haven’t Googled it yet.
If not I’d claim it as your own and get to work selling the idea:-)
Hey, I just realized that wrapper looks like a condom wrapper. It’s Alka Seltzer. That’s a goblet of Alka Seltzer with lace under-things.
HA! This was a great post. Poor grandpa–he’s underrepresented.
I agree. Usually older characters are portrayed as senile, humorous, non sexual beings – or evil like the dying mastermind in saw. Great post Jean. Thoroughly enjoyed it.
I have never heard of a Slo Poke. I think that just showed my age, too. I pray my sex life doesn’t end at 35. I’m not a huge fan of gardening. Being younger, I wouldn’t mind seeing a “middle aged” romance. I’d rather get a glimpse of something closer to reality, than a bunch of pretty airheads faking it.
A two headed beast dog! Dude, I read up a lot on dreams. When people tell me about their dreams, I can’t help but feel like I’m violating them. I had to read this with one eye open… Google search “dream and mood dictionary”. Look up your dream symbols from now on — you’ll see what I mean. It sounds hokie, I know, but give it a whirl. Its incredible…
I love analyzing my dreams. It’s hard to figure out other people’s dreams, though. There is so much that comes into play. How they feel in the dream, how they feel looking back on the dream, what aspects seemed important in the dream, did anything they’ve done recently or are going to do influence it . . .
Thanks for reading. I don’t feel violated at all! Glad you like my double-headed beast!